Disconnect to Reconnect...

Hey Everyone,

How many of you are spending most of your time in social networking sites???? How many of you are constantly busy with your smartphones and are not aware whatsoever, what is happening in reality... I just want to tell all you guys one thing.... You are not alone.... :P Even I was the same... Before my Transformationnnnn..... :D

But has anyone else noticed that being so much 'Virtually Social' is not helping your self esteem. In fact it is degrading your self esteem more and more. How many of you feel that you have started to crave more and more people's acceptance and appreciation to make yourself feel good?

OK. I am sure I am not the only one who has my hands raised here. :) Why does that happen? And that constantly being a part of someone else's life, why is it making me miserable?

Well I got my answer in the question itself. That's where the problem is. We are so much into someone else's life that we forgot we have a life of our own here too. So one of my friend is having a super fun girls night out with all her girlfriends and posting her pics, why am I here sitting and brooding over why I can't get to do that???? But do I actually need that? I mean I have a perfectly amazing husband here with whom I can have a perfectly awesome night or even day out. Do I really need so many girlfriends? May be she needs it because she feels lonely. And Hello, how many of her 'girlfriends' are actually a good friend huh??? They may be there only to have fun and click selfies to show the world how much fun they are having when in reality, they may be bitching about each other behind their back.

And while I am having fun with my husband, do I need to click a picture of each and every thing we do? Do I need people's approval to prove that I had fun? When in fact I wasn't even having fun because I was busy clicking and posting the pictures ignoring my husband and the time that we were spending together.

So Throw Away Your Smartphones!!!!! OK, don't actually do that. hee hee :D. But I have devised some steps how not to let them affect your life and have a lot of fun, for real.

1) Do not get sucked in, in their fabulousness which is just an illusion.

2) Do not interfere in other people's life. Do not go around texting, so what you did last night, post pics. Come on. Concentrate on your life, please.

3) It is not necessary to always give a feedback to everything they post. It is not necessary that you have to like whatever they post. You are free to dislike. And learn from facebook. It doesn't have a dislike option. Which tells you that when you dislike something you don't have to be vocal about it. There is a perfectly good option to ignore and be silent. Unless you are the kind of person who loves to praise others, well you can. But don't let it affect you in anyway.

4) Love yourself, Love your life. Its just as good as theirs.

5) Do not get carried away with those fabulous pictures they post of themselves. There are many filters in instagram you know. They might not be as half as good - looking as they do in their photos.

6) Do not have any expectations from anyone when you post something. As you are free to like or dislike, everyone else is. And there may be many reasons for them not to like your post or comment. Bad network, no net access, too busy to like or comment, or just plain, 'their choice'. Which doesn't, by the way decide, what you posted was good or bad. Number of likes or comments don't decide anything.

7) It is not your goal in life to be the most popular person on a social networking site. There are many other 'real' goals in life.

8) Do not think about any post once the window is closed.  Unless its a very funny joke which will make you laugh later. :D :D

9) Try and interact more with people in real life than virtually. I assure you it will be a lot more fulfilling.

Network Responsibly. ;)

Transformationnnn....

Hello All,

I am sure after reading this post you might think, is it the same woman who wrote the earlier post. Well I am. But I am Transformedddd..... Is it the right spelling?? :P

I have found the secret of happiness in life. Or I can say refound it?( Is that a word?). What I mean is I am different now. I feel different. I am starting to love myself... And started to have a lot of funnn.....

The secret is known to everyone. It is. Everyone use it in their life. You did, seriously. OK, enough of the 'suspense' and let me reveal it. It is ........... YOUR CHILDHOOD!!!!!!

Just go deep inside and remember,"How were you when you were just a kid?". Did you ever worry about depression, stress, my image, my self esteem. Hell NO!!!! I didn't even know the meaning of all those words. Did You???

Then why do we do it now? Where did we learn it from? We were happy when we were children because we were 'ourselves'. We didn't care of impressing someone, doing something for someone, making others happy, did we?

They say ignorance is bliss. Yes, it is. We weren't even aware we could make others happy with our behavior. But, in fact, that is the truth. We cannot make others happy. We cannot control how others feel, think, about them about, about you. Then why waste so much time in doing all that?????

You might say, 'It is expected from us now to behave in a certain way, back then there were no such expectations.' OK. But why so much pretensions??? Why do we have to be someone we are not???

You can do what you can but why worry about what you cannot do. You can love who you are, why hate what you are not. Everyone is different. Everyone is unique. Everyone is special. Now I know you might say, we have heard that everywhere. Then why don't you apply it.

I am not asking you to be act like a kid, but if you do want to act like an adult, act like you adult. Don't try to be someone else. You are not your mother, your friend, your colleague, your husband, etc. etc. and also they are not you. Enjoy who you are. because you are you. And don't expect them to be something they are not because they are they. ACCEPTANCE, my friend, of yourself, and of others make a looot of difference...

We never tried to change ourselves or others as a kid, why now. Enjoy everyone's uniqueness, enjoy your own uniqueness. My hair is not beautiful, who says??? Who defined beautiful??? Just because someone said straight long and shining hair is beautiful, does not mean it is. I am my own beautiful. My hair is short, frizzy, thin, but I love it. Because its a part of who I am. It is what makes me, me. If I get long luscious hair I wont be me anymore. And I don't want me to be not me.

If I am introvert, I don't like to talk to others much, big deal. Not everyone has to be bubbly, cheerful. And just because I don't talk much doesn't mean I am no fun. I am my own kind of fun. And there are people who love me just as I am and in fact find bubbly people irritating...

Shower love upon you generously. You deserve it!!!! You are awesome!!!!! Take out some time alone to be a kid again. Watch cartoons that you watched as a kid. Eat chocolates, and forget about the calories for once. enjoy all the things which you did as a kid for sometimes. Get in touch with your inner child, again. Love yourself, without the burden of being in charge of everything just for sometime....

Enjoy life, its amazing!!!!! :) :)

What's holding you down????

How many times do we think over all the weaknesses that we have and finally come to the conclusion, it is because of so and so in the past? Mostly it is the childhood, the environment that we were brought up in, our parents. And in many cases its more of blaming, mostly our parents. Why were they like that, why didn't they give us the love, support, appreciation, confidence? Why were they critical? If they would have given the support, love, etc. our life would have been better. It could be others too actually when it gets to complaining or blaming we come up with thousands of things from our friends, school, college to the country and the government.

I have to admit I was one of that. In fact I once talked to a counsellor regarding that too. It was regarding my parents and she said that just forgive your parents for whatever they were not able to give you because all parents cannot give everything. Well it worked for me to some extent, I mean I was not mad at them anymore but then the thought still stayed at the back of my mind that I am, unconfident or timid or slow or whatever because of them, it may be the genes too I thought. I let go of the anger but couldnt let go of the weakness which was more important.

I was sick and tired of not being confident or, with no good health or all the weaknesses that I have. Which finally gave me the answer to let go. I had mentioned this one before "If you want to fly, you have got to let go of the shit that holds you down." This was more of a trap where i was stuck which wasnt allowing me to fly. And I came up with an affirmation, " My present and future life is completely unaffected by my past" it could be wrong I mean, the truth may be that past does affect my present and the future but I want my subconscious to live in this lie. Because this lie will allow me to live me life all new each day without any regrets or without thinking what if I could have got this or done this. Without any blame to anyone, and looking at problems only in present tense and finding solutions, with whatever strenghts I have. Develeping all  the stengths that I want to have without thinking about why I didnt have them in the first place. This has really allowed me to to be free from the trap and take each day as it comes with new perspective.

If you too want to let yourself free from this trap try repeating the above affirmation everyday to yourself. Program your subconscious the way you want your present and future to be. Take your life and your mind in your hands. 

Secrets of a millionaire mind

I Just saw 6 part video of T. Harv Eker's Secrets of a Millionaire mind.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeNAGoFSqno

It was really amazing. I just realised in how many ways I was thinking wrongly about wealth, not just wealth but success as a whole. What he said made complete sense, meaning wanting to be rich not always means you are greedy. It is what we are meant to be. Like one of the other motivational speakers, Bob Proctor said, "You were born rich", but forgot along the way that we are and started wasting our time in this limited mentality. Anyways, you are not alone. And it can be changed anytime. One of the steps is to watch the video and try following the steps mentioned. It is really motivating. Just try it.

A technique for reducing your mental weight.

I would like to share with you today a technique which will help you to reduce your burden. I had read somewhere, "If you want to fly, you got to let go of the shit that holds you down". And since this blog is dedicated to better living, this technique should be applied in order to let go of the burden, so that you become light and move ahead with more energy.

This technique is apologizing for your mistakes. I know I have not revealed some big secret. But these simple things which we were taught in the childhood too, but forgot to apply when we grew up, will help you to be better.

To know what you have to apologize for, you have to let go of any ego and be brutally honest with yourself. Come on, it doesn't even make sense to lie to yourself. You are already naked in front of yourself and that should be the way. Sit quietly with yourself. Talk to yourself as if you were talking to a very very close friend whom you can trust with any of your dark secrets. Don't be afraid of yourself its just you, You wont judge yourself.

Think of anything, any event of past, any behavior of yours which was hurtful to someone, and which you denied as your own fault but actually it is eating you away inside. It is our tendency to defend ourselves in everything and always put the blame on others. Thats why I said you have to be brutally honest with yourself. I am sure you will find more than one incident or behavior of yours which in someway or the other, hurt someone.

After you do find such things, please please do not go into the guilt of making that mistake. It is ok, first and foremost forgive yourself for those things. We are only human, we all make some or the other mistakes. It is a part of the past which you cannot change. You are a better person now. We just need to close that matter once and for all, forever. That is why we are doing this exercise.

Next step you do is, apologize that person for those things. It needs courage, but having that courage for that time is worth it, which will benefit you both, and make your life better from now on. Tell him/ her honestly about all the things you feel you did wrong to them, and sincerely apologize to them. In many cases, the person may no longer be with you, may be due to death, or any other reason. What you can do is, meditate, and while you do so, bring that soul in front of you, and in presence of God, apologize to him/ her. We all are souls, energy. And nothing, nor distance nor death can come between us in if we want to genuinely communicate. Your vibrations will reach that soul and will benefit you both. And that burden will be released.

Your job is over. You might wonder how that person will react, whether he/she will forgive me or not. Well thats their problem not ours. When we apologize, we are clearing out our burden and any negative energy we have for that soul. And whether that person will do the same for him/herself, rests on him/her. You are clear inside and ready to move on with your life with new energy.